Discontentedness in Living

(MH – February 29th, 2016 – leap day)

I have found that it is so easy to be discontent – it seems we are incessantly complaining over this or that item that may have not worked out well for this little soul – and over the years he has also heard much dis-contentedness from others, who have experienced also the Grace and the Mercy of God.

abba anthony1Sometimes, dear soul, I wonder that God does not throw up His Hands and just strike everyone of us dead and forget about the whole matter of Redemption and Reconciliation of us sinners; but then, I am not GOD.

Have you ever experienced just wanting to go through one single day – no, maybe a half a day at least – just not hearing yourself or anyone else complaining about something?

LORD Jesus – my Beloved – my desire is to stop this complaining that comes from me – and the constant “dripping” of complaining that comes from others; those of us (all of us) who have your blessings every second of the day – our very next heartbeat – our next breath – our next movement – we owe everything to you in time and space and in the eternity that we will step into by God’s Mercy and Grace.

What will it take to wake us up to the Reality of this Grace?

I know the answer to that… deprivation that is real – being disciplined to have all the so called, “blessings” taken from us – these trivialities that matter not a “hair’s breadth” in eternity!

You see, dear ones, we are so vulnerable to the situations in life that can main or kill us – the diseases, the terrorist and terrors that may be allowed against our physical or mental capacities – we are fearfully and wonderfully made – and God did not promise to us perfect happiness in this present evil age, you know?

I am so tired – so weary – and, frankly, so embarrassed over my own complaining – and I am in fact a hypocrite, when I have complained; especially, when I think of all that I have complained about to others; and therefore, like Lot, I am as “one who mocks” when I encourage another soul not to complain.

Dear souls, I have had my encouragements thrown right back into my teeth lately, because that soul has heard me complain – and the person was right – I have been hypocritical, when I complain.

We should LISTEN more than we should speak!

471816_detail8_maxTherefore, the desire to speak less frequently is heard by the little soul – and he senses that when we speak less, we have less a chance to sin by saying things that are not positive and true.

I am reminded by the desert fathers:  (When he was dying, Abba Pambo said:  From the time that I came into this solitude and built my cell and dwelt in it, I cannot remember eating any food that I have not earned with my own hands, nor speaking any word that I have been sorry for until now.  And so I go to the Lord, as one who has not yet begun to serve God.)

We are such fools, are we not; that we cannot seem to comprehend, when we are speaking – that we will all appear before the Judgment Seat of Christ Jesus and give an accounting for every idle thought and speech before the WORD of GOD – where every word we have ever uttered will be tested as to its motivation?

Dear souls, even though God forgives, when we confess our sins – this appearing before Him produces an underlying – “uneasiness” within the little soul, who is seeking to never sin against Him ever again?

May God give to us all – Mercy in these times of “discontentedness” – may He place a guard upon our tongues that they may only praise and honor Him – and not complain so much?

Abba Anthony the repentant sinner

One Response to “Discontentedness in Living”

  1. alicia gonzalez Says:

    Dear Abba,
    You ve been a mirror of God s words and image through your work. Thanks for the courage and humility to recognize that you are human. But God who uses our little existence to shine through and certainly we can see how God works through you. Then thanks “for being available” to that grace.

Leave a Reply